The happiest couples are not the ones still stuck in the puppy love phase. They are not the ones who believe everything is perfect and their person can do no wrong. They are not the ones who walk around without a care in the world because their relationship has only been sunshine and roses so far.

The happiest couples are the ones who have been through rough patches and survived. The ones who suffered through real problems, but instead of letting those problems destroy the relationship, they found a way to become stronger. To grow as a team. To talk through their issues and come to compromises.

The happiest couples are not always happy. Sometimes they get frustrated with each other. Sometimes they do not want to be in the same room as each other. Sometimes they let their anger get the best of them.

At the end of the day, the happiest couples are not blinded by their love for each other. They are well aware of flaws. They have seen the darkest sides of each other. They have stood together through the worst of times.

The happiest couples have seen each other cry buckets of tears over family issues and work stress. They have been in intense arguments over the stupidest of things — but they have never crossed over a boundary. They have never said something unforgivable. They have never reached a point of no return.

Even when they were mad at each other, even when they had more fight left in them, they still wanted a hug. They still wanted to cuddle. They wanted to forget the fight ever happened and move passed it as soon as possible because the other person mattered to them more than whatever they were fighting about.

The happiest couples are realists. They are not living in a fairy tale. Their expectations are not unreasonable. They love each other, they cherish each other, but they do not place each other on pedestals because they are only human. They do not expect their person to be perfect. They only expect their person to try their best.

The happiest couples have been through a rough patch or two. They could have called it quits after their loudest arguments and parted ways, but they chose to stick out the relationship. They chose to take the harder route and fix things. They chose to continue loving each other even though it would have been easier to walk away.

The happiest couples know what it’s like to fight — but they also know what it’s like to reconnect. They are good listeners. They are mature. They are experienced in the art of saying sorry and offering forgiveness.

Even though it might seem like new couples who haven’t had their first fight yet are the ones with the biggest smiles on their faces, the couples who have been together forever, the ones who have complete trust in each other, the ones who believe they can make it through anything together, are the happiest of all.